I Am Not Able
1. Often, when the violence of our passions threatens to overcome all
our powers of resistance, we are tempted to say: “Lord, I am not able; I
cannot go any further. Why are You not helping me? Why have you
abandoned me?” This is a trick of the devil to make us give up the
fight, to make us believe that God has deserted us and that we must
inevitably give in to temptation.
This is the last stratagem of the devil when he sees that he cannot
persuade us in any other manner. But the Lord addresses to us the
reproof which he addressed to St. Peter who, while walking on the water,
doubted for an instant, and then felt himself going under. “O thou of
little faith, why didst thou doubt?” (Mt. 14:31) In such a situation, we
must strengthen our faith, our love, and our dedication to Jesus
Christ. Then the Lord will extend His helping hand to us as He did to
Peter. He will give us the spiritual tranquility which only grace and
Christian fortitude can offer.
Let us recall how this has
happened in the temptations of our past life. When we were strong and
generous with Jesus, we implored His help with faith and perseverance
and emerged victorious from the fray. Then we experienced the heavenly
joy which only God can give. Why can we not always do the same? We must
never say: “I am not able!” We are poor and weak, but with the grace of
God we can overcome all obstacles. As St. Paul says, “I can do all
things in him who strengthens me.” (Phil. 4:13)
2. Whenever we
feel called upon to make some sacrifice for Jesus or to form some good
resolution, how often do we cry: “I am not able!” It may be a question
of praying more fervently, of performing some mortification, or of
helping our neighbour spiritually or materially. Or perhaps it is a
matter of saying a few words of apology or of encouragement to our
neighbour, whom we have previously treated with coldness and
selfishness. Or it may be something entirely more generous which is
demanded; it may be that God is inviting us to renounce ourselves
completely and to dedicate ourselves to Him. Naturally this requires
sacrifice, and great generosity of heart. But we say to Jesus when He
calls us: “I cannot, it is too difficult!” And yet the Lord says: “You
shall make and keep yourselves holy, because I am holy.” (Lev. 11:44;
19:2) “You therefore, are to be perfect, even as your heavenly Father is
perfect.” (Mt. 5:48) We must not refuse God, Who became man for us and
shed His blood for our redemption.
3. When the crosses sent to
us by God have seemed too heavy, we have often uttered these words of
refusal in a mood of weariness or even in a spirit of revolt. If only we
had taken our sorrow to the foot of the Crucifix! Then we should not
have had the audacity to have spoken these selfish and unchristian
words.
We would have remembered that Jesus, the innocent Lamb,
suffered for love of us, and we could not then have told Him that our
cross was too heavy. We would have embraced it with resignation and
walked towards Heaven in the footsteps of Christ.
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