The Repentance of St. Peter
1. Peter had denied his Master three times. He was standing in the
courtyard of the High Priest warming himself before a brazier and not
even thinking of the depths to which he had descended. Jesus,
calumniated, struck and mocked as if He were criminal, forgets
altogether about Himself. Moved by compassion for the leader of His
Apostles, now become a perjurer, He
turns His gaze towards him. Peter is jerked back to his senses by this
look, which is at the same time stern and affectionate. He realises at
last the level to which he has fallen. He is stricken to the heart and
feels a sudden tightness in his throat. “And Peter went out and wept
bitterly.” (Luke 22:62)
Peter saw clearly at this stage the
chasm into which he had fallen. He thought of all the gifts and favours
which he had received from Jesus and recalled the prophecy which his
Master had made. “A cock will not crow this day, until thou hast denied
three times that thou knowest me.” (Luke 22:34) He remembered also how
he had sworn that he would never deny Jesus. Now he saw himself in the
role of the prodigal son or the lost sheep... and as he wept bitterly he
saw again the reproachful yet loving gaze of Jesus. His grief found an
outlet in his tears and he was filled with confidence that Jesus in His
infinite goodness would forgive him. If we should fall (as we often do,
unfortunately), let us rise again immediately as Peter did. Let us weep
for our sins and kneeling before Jesus, represented by the priest, let
us confess our faults and tell God that we shall never offend Him again.
2. When Peter realised how wretchedly he had fallen, the first thing
which he did was to escape from the occasion of sin. “Peter went out.”
(Luke 22:62) He grieved for his three sins not only on that sad night
but throughout his life. St. Clement writes that he wept so often that
his tears wore two deep furrows in his cheeks and that whenever he heard
the cock crowing, the cry pierced his heart. He loved Jesus sincerely
and passionately. When he was asked three times if he loved Him, he
replied humbly: “Lord, thou knowest that I love thee.” (Cf. John 21:16)
Can we say these same words to Jesus with equal sincerity and humility?
If we really love Jesus as Peter did, and are prepared to face death for
His sake as Peter was, then we may be sure that we shall never offend
God again.
3. Two of the Apostles sinned seriously. Peter
denied Jesus and Judas betrayed Him. Both regretted their offence, but
Peter's was the repentance of love and that of Judas was the remorse of
despair. Judas also admitted his fault. “I have sinned,” he said, “in
betraying innocent blood.” (Mt. 27:4) He flung the thirty pieces of
silver, which he received as a reward for his crime, into the temple.
But he did not return to Jesus, Who had even called him His friend at
the time of the betrayal. He did not trust in His infinite goodness, but
went away in despair and hanged himself with a halter from a tree. Let
us adore the mystery of the providence and mercy of God, but let us
remember that we are lost if we abuse it. Our next sin could be the last
which we should have the opportunity of committing. If God did not
grant us the grace to repent, we could end in the manner of Judas rather
than that of Peter. Let us think earnestly about this and form new
resolutions with sincerity and humility.
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